Not only do we break all ten commandments, we smoke pot behind Walgreens every Friday night

Shelby came over yesterday. I hadn't seen her for about a week but it seemed more equivalent to ETERNITY. Shelby makes life so much more amusing.

Shelby and I have known eachother since we were knee-high to a cosmetics counter. We are way more comfortable with eachother than any humans should be. We tell eachother things that no human in their right mind would utter to any other living thing with ears. But who ever said we were in our right minds?

So she calls me on her cell phone. "Hey, Dara. I'm on my way to your house. We can chill for awhile. But then, like, I have to, like, go work out. Urrgh." So she came in wearing a black tank top that only showed her bra straps and some glow-in-the-dark, neon green soffe's and showed me her new haircut. Then we went in the kitchen and showed my mom her new haircut. Shelby quickly tried to hide her bra straps after a couple minutes of that trying-to-hide-it-but-not-really look of disapproval from my mother. "Sorry. I'm gonna go work out in a lil bit... So...." We swiftly vacated the premises and retreated to my room.

After talking for a half-hour about her boyfriend, Derek, (who, by the way, is pretty good looking even though I've only seen one picture that isn't very good) we reminisced about the time when my mom wouldn't allow me to go up to Target with Shelby cos she was wearing a shirt that (GASP, SHOCK) showed her bra straps!!! The HORROR! And she said to Shelby that she was dressed very inappropriately and she wouldn't allow her daughter to be seen with her like that. A fucking bra strap, people! I say just show 'em. Its not like she's your mother. If she was, you probably would have killed yourself by now. I don't know why I haven't.

Then somehow we got off talking about seeing our siblings naked. (We talk about the weirdest things. One time we spent a good 20 minutes discussing pooping in public restrooms and why Shelby refuses to do so.) Shelby asked, "Have you ever seen Daniel naked?" "Um, duh. We took BATHES together 'til I was 8! Oh shit. You can't tell anyone that." "I won't. But that's so gross, Dara... I have to go pee. Come with me." Yes, I know. We are way too comfortable.

As she was leaving, she said, "Hey, I'd say bye to your mom but she can't look at me like this. I'm probably breaking one of those ten commandments somewhere in there."

I love that woman.


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